Alas, it seems I have broken a few of the resolutions I had set back in January (I’m only human, right?). I know it has been quite some time since my last post and I apologize to you all for the long wait. I attribute the lack of updates to the tumultuous turn my life has taken in the past few months. A lot has happened since the last time I had posted: DJed my first wedding (plus 2 more indian wedding receptions), returned home to Cincinnati to celebrate my little brother’s 15th bday, got offered to sign with a DJ talent agency, finished out my post-baccalaureate program with a 4.0 GPA… and finally, found out that I would NOT be going to medical school this fall. As you can imagine, it’s been a pretty big disappointment that my plan A, a goal which I’ve been working almost half my life towards, did not come to fruition.
To be honest, I have been putting off posting in this blog b/c I knew I could not post an update without at least mentioning this. I needed some time to get my head around things before I was able to really channel how I am feeling on here. Also, I’ve been terribly busy juggling all the craziness that is figuring out my plan for this coming year. So I guess many of my friends are thinking: “What now? Why don’t you just reapply?” I know many people who were not successful their first application cycle and got in on the subsequent tries, yet when faced with this time-sensitive decision, I ask myself, just how bad did I really want it?
I’ve spent many years thinking that being a physician was the job for me, a path I am not afraid to admit was influenced greatly by the wishes of my Asian parents. But despite these external pressures, I still have always had a passion for helping others and combining that with my love for science just made sense to direct myself towards a career in medicine. Even with all this, I have consistently struggled with the question of whether I would be truly be happy as a physician 10-20 years down the road. Up until recently, I tried to avoid coming up with a genuine answer and kept thinking that I would cross that bridge when I got to it. And now here I am in the middle of that bridge, with many options ahead of me and little time to make them. Having had so many instances of doubt and uncertainty, I have to consider if it is really worth it to grind and fully dedicate myself to something I know will be extremely challenging and may result in a life of dissatisfaction?
It has been a very tough call, but I’ve decided that I will NOT be reapplying to medical school. However, this by no means signifies me “giving up” on my career goals. Not getting into medical school has been the biggest rejection I have ever faced, yet I find that even though the initial days following the news were full of dispair and confusion, I have since risen up with much greater clarity and confidence for what I want in life. So after much soul-searching, I believe that the lifestyle of a medical doctor is just not for me; instead, I have switched gears and am focusing on a related career that I believe I am much better suited for and know I will absolutely love: Physical Therapy. With the exposure I’ve had to the field through all these years of volunteer work, classes, shadowing, research, applying etc. this is the first time I feel like I’ve made a decision solely on my own accord and it feels fantastic. These collective experiences have distilled over time, and left me with what I truly want out of a career in healthcare: to be the personal support and guide for those undergoing the healing process. To me, PT is all about giving someone his or her independence, an aspect which is often taken for granted, yet so crucial to a happy life. Restoring movement and providing comfort to others on a daily basis is something I truly look forward to. Not to mention, the lifestyle and career-track of a PT is much less intense/stressful (in terms of malpractice/responsibility) than that of an MD, which would give me more flexibility to enjoy my other passions. For once, I am genuinely excited and looking forward to the entering this new stage in my life with a definitive plan. So perhaps this rejection was a blessing in disguise after all…
In any case, this means that I will be staying in St. Louis for another year at least (though Wash U’s PT program is quite awesome – #3 in the country), a city which I have grown to love the past 6 years, however strange that may sound. I finally have a plan, a goal and the drive to get it done, and the fortune of having an awesome interim job that can float me in the meantime! Speaking of which, if you haven’t already checked out my other blog Spinnin’ Along, you may want to keep some tabs on that as I have some VERY EXCITING NEWS (hint) to share soon. Despite a rocky start, I have a feeling this next year is going to be my greatest yet and I cannot wait to share it with you.
And now it’s really time to get this blog going. This break was definitely needed, but I have so much else prepared for bananalife; time to unload!
Until next time,